Trick or Treat!

Halloween is nearly here, the night where, according to old Celtic beliefs, the dead can cross over to the living.  While these days Halloween is much more about dressing up and getting candy than it is about unearthly spirits, and not everyone in the world observes the occasion, many countries from Canada to Australia do, and there you can expect to find parties going on and trick-or-treaters running from house to house.

A friend of mine recently told me she had no trick-or-treaters come to her house at all last year, while still another friend guiltily admitted that she *hates* children ringing her doorbell and that she finds the whole event ridiculous and annoying.  I found both of these stories alarming because on what other day of the year do we allow our children to be this spirited and silly, to step onto their neighbour's doorstep and learn that the world can be a welcoming place? And consider this, how often to we get the chance to open our home to strangers and actually give them something? Don't we want every chance we can get for our children to discover how beautifully generous and kind strangers can be?  When we spend so much of our time educating them on how to protect themselves, how to be wary of strangers, on being careful in this difficult world, isn't it wonderful that we have at least one day a year when they can knock on their neighbour's door and be greeted with a smile and given a treat?  Halloween can be a beautiful opportunity to learn about, and practice, generosity, kindness, community, and simple, old-fashioned fun.

wishing you a fun and beautiful Halloween,
hk

It's a secret!

Have you ever known someone who manages, despite the madness or sadness in his or her life, to see something good, something beautiful?  Here's the secret:

You need to let the things 

that would ordinarily bore you 

suddenly thrill you.  

~ Andy Warhol

 

wishing you the courage to be that person today,

hk

Be Kind!

In the last 2 weeks I have displaced a rib, fallen out of my wheelchair while on a charity fundraising walk (and on a bridge at night no less), nursed a urinary tract infection, and dealt with the world's worst cold (well, maybe not the world's worst, but it was awful).  Having been away for a few days, I checked out what is happening on social media, and if I had enough voice to squeal, I would have.  Instead, I just pumped my arms in the air when I saw this:

November 1st is Random Acts of Kindness Day in my city.  Although this is happening in Saskatoon, it is actually part of a national movement where 10 cities in Canada will participate.   The Saskatoon Community Foundation is proud to be promoting this 'pay it forward' movement and you can learn more at: http://www.saskatooncommunityfoundation.ca.

Imagine the fun you could have!
- buy someone a coffee
- tip someone who rarely, if ever, gets tipped (a gas attendant, for example)
- bring treats for your co-workers
- take cookies to a neighbour
- pick up some litter and put it in the garbage
- take a bundle of flowers to a nursing home

The point is not to over-think this, but rather keep kindness in your consciousness that day and act.  You don't need to spend a lot, if any, money.  You don't need to make a grand gesture.  Just be kind.  How beautiful is that? 

And if you don't have a designated day in your home city, who cares?  Why wouldn't you do something kind and see what happens?  You may never see the outcome of your kindness but you will notice how it makes you feel to do it.  Leave a comment or send me a message - I love to hear about your beauty.  

wishing you a kind and beautiful day,
hk

5 Beautiful Things About Social Media

I read an article yesterday about ways to be "insufferable" on facebook: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/wait-but-why/annoying-facebook-behavior_b_4081038.html
A quick search led me to countless essays that complain about how people behave on social media and the most annoying facebook personalities - the narcissist, the constant status-updater, the shameless self-promoter, the baby-bore...and on it goes.  I laughed at some of this because we all have friends who do this, and then I cringed because I would all be lying if I was not sometimes guilty of some of these social media crimes. We can all be insufferable.  We can all be judgmental, selfish, self-absorbed, attention-craving braggarts.  Absolutely.

However, there is more to Facebook posts and Twitter feeds than that.  Although you won't find many essays on them, there are many beautiful things to see, hear, and experience on social media. Here are a few I came up with:

1. Connection.  Most of us need connection; we need social interaction to be happy.  Sure, we may have added friends that we do not know well, or "friended" those who we barely spoke to in high school, but I know I am not the only one who feels good about connecting with friends I may not have seen in years but who I still care about.  It is nice to see pictures of my second cousin's children because she lives in England and it is fun to wish my cousin Happy Birthday and comment on what we are each reading since I live in Canada and she lives in Indonesia and we rarely see each other in person.  Having a disability, I am grateful for the several connections I have with others around the world who also have disabilities.  We talk and we share all because of social media.  These connections make my life happier.  Furthermore, it is great to connect with people I meet at events, get to know them better through social media, then possibly further connect in person later on.  Beyond friends and acquaintances, we can connect with your community, your interests, and different organizations, which allows you to stay informed, which leads me to number 2.

2. Information.  You can learn a lot through social media whether it is a new recipe or a community event you want to attend, you can also see what other people are saying about it.  As a country, nay, as an entire planet, think of all we learned from Commander Chris Hadfield's tweets and facebook posts during his recent expedition on the International Space Station! Breaking news, well-written essays, or topics that you can learn about that you were not even previously aware of,  social media can be a great source of opportunity, learning, and knowledge. 

3. Charity.  Some recent studies (for example, http://www.theguardian.com/voluntary-sector-network/2013/sep/26/charity-leaders-social-media-mba) have revealed that 8 out of 10 are more likely to trust and buy from an organization whose CEO and leadership team use social media.  By sharing stories and news items, charities can connect with their supporters in new and meaningful ways through social media, and when that happens, deeper bonds are created and maintained.  From my own experience of rappelling down a building in The Drop Zone fundraiser for Easter Seals a few years ago, I can say that I generated more donations from online fundraising than any face-to-face asks that I made.  Social media, quite frankly, made fundraising beautifully easy.

4. Fun.  Don't we all need a little more fun in our lives?  Isn't it fun to have a banter of words with a friend? To post a Halloween pictures? To pin out-of-the-box creative ideas on out Pinterest boards? To wish our friends happy birthday and remind them how great they are? Social media can be entertaining, amusing, light-hearted, and fun.

5. Beauty.  I bet you were wondering when I'd get to this.  Oh, I know.  There are countless posters and jokes that are insulting and rude out there.  Sure.  There are also countless posters, quotes, images, and "jokes" posted by people who are trying to bring some beauty, positivity, joy, and light to social media.   Just one: https://www.facebook.com/PositivityLoveAndAllThingsGood?fref=ts

There is no question that social media should not replace face-to-face interaction, checking in with each other on the phone, going out for coffee, and spending quality time together.  There is also the question of what content should remain private and what is okay to be public.  These questions and many more need to continually be asked because (I have said it before and I will say it again) the Internet is a baby and we are only just beginning to figure out how to live and work with it.  We have a lot to learn.  But let's take a moment to quit complaining about it and the people who use it, and instead reflect on the beauty it brings to our lives.

wishing you fewer complaints and more beautiful stuff,
hk

Lennon's legacy

John Lennon was born on this day in 1940. He was, of course, one of the Beatles, as well as a songwriter, musician, artist, and peace activist.   He was known as the "smart Beatle" and he was outspoken, witty, clever, and beautifully gifted.  Although he was murdered in December of 1980, his musical and peace-loving legacies live on.

How fortunate he was to have left such a long-lasting legacy.  Perhaps it has something to do with my recent birthday causing me to reflect on what I hope one day my own legacy will be, but this idea of leaving a stamp behind once I am gone has been on my mind.  At some point, I think it is something many of us consider: "Am I enriching lives?" "Is it clear what I believe in and what I support?" And, "Am I making a difference?" 

John Lennon led a complicated life in many ways; he, like all of us, made mistakes.  He was also incredibly self-aware and tuned in to what really matters in life.  He saw that in a world that has so much violence, despair, and injustice, that we need beauty more than ever.  He was awake to what was beautiful in this life and passed it on.  He had faith in people, and wanted us to know: 

"Remember love. The only hope for any of us is peace...

You're all geniuses and you're all beautiful. 

You don't need anybody to tell you who you are or what you are. 

You are what you are."

wishing you the belief that you are all geniuses and you are all beautiful,

hk

Beautiful Malala

You have probably heard the news stories about her.  Malala Yousafzai.  On the way to school in Northwest Pakistan a year ago, with chemistry and calculus on her mind, a gunman boarded the bus she was on, asked, "Who is Malala?" and then shot her in the head.

Miraculously, she survived.

In a culture where girls are not valued, and where no one congratulated her parents when she was born,  Malala could have grown up with the lowest of expectations.  However, her father who is himself an educator, felt that she and other girls deserved an education and founded the school Malala attended and maintained it despite the stress of threats he lived with for doing so.  His beliefs and actions had a strong influence on his daughter, and she began writing a blog for the BBC under a pseudonym when she was just 11 years old that challenged the Taliban's views on the rights of women and girls. Although they tried to protect her anonymity, she became known in Pakistan and therefore also known to the Taliban. 

Now, one year later, she lives in England with her family, and she’s the famous survivor of this Taliban assassination attempt, an activist for education of women and girls, and in the running to win the Nobel Peace Prize. Tomorrow, on the one year anniversary of the assassination attempt, she will speak to CBC's Anna Maria Tremonti on The Current. I encourage you to listen in.  http://www.cbc.ca/radio/   Malala has also released a memoir, I Am Malala which is being released today. 

Here is a link to the address she gave to the UN on her 16th birthday. She encourages us all to speak up, be strong, and to fight for what is right.  A note of caution: you may be moved, so watch it with a tissue.
http://www.cbc.ca/newsblogs/yourcommunity/2013/07/malalas-10-most-inspiring-quotes-from-her-un-speech.html

The speech is beautiful, strong, and inspirational.  Here is just a piece of it:
"I do not even hate the Talib who shot me. Even if there is a gun in my hand and he stands in front of me. I would not shoot him. This is the compassion that I have learnt from Muhammad-the prophet of mercy, Jesus Christ and Lord Buddha. This is the legacy of change that I have inherited from Martin Luther King, Nelson Mandela and Muhammad Ali Jinnah. This is the philosophy of non-violence that I have learnt from Gandhi Jee, Bacha Khan and Mother Teresa. And this is the forgiveness that I have learnt from my mother and father. This is what my soul is telling me, be peaceful and love everyone.
Dear sisters and brothers, we realise the importance of light when we see darkness." 

Wishing you the beauty and "importance of light when we see darkness,"
hk

 

Marking dates

Certain dates have meaning for all of us.  They mark birthdays, anniversaries, and specific events. Looking back on them affords us an opportunity to reflect on their meaning, how we changed, how we grew, and sometimes how we survived.

The accident that resulted in my spinal cord injury was 37 years ago, but today I do not mark that significant day.  Instead I mark the 7 year anniversary that I underwent a major surgery - the second one within 2 months - and a time where the continuation of my life (that included a small baby and 9 year old boy) was definitely in question.  I hung on with the love and support of my family and friends, a dedicated surgeon, and medical miracles like IV antibiotics, and donated blood and bone cells, and with the fragile hope that I would survive in order to one day witness two things: see my son grow into a beautiful guitar player and hear him play "Blackbird" by the Beatles, and that I would be able to one day braid my daughter's hair.  You might wonder why I would want to remember this time that was so vulnerable, tenuous, and filled with pain, chaos, and loss. Wouldn't it be better to regard an event such as this as the past, a time better left alone?

Maybe.  However, I recently read about a woman who wrote her own obituary and one of the things she said was that she hoped her children realize that pain and difficulties are not obstacles on their life's journey, but rather, they are just the journey.  This day marks part of my journey.  It celebrates the fact that I am still here and that at least 2 of my wishes have come true.  All of us mark the events of our lives, privately or publicly, and when you mark yours, whatever dates on the calendar they may be, my wish for you is a moment of reflection, peace, and beauty.

wishing you the beauty of a marked day,
hk

12 Songs to help you have a more beautiful day

1.     “Sir Duke” by Stevie Wonder.  Scowl while listening to this song, I dare you to try.

2.     “Hello Bonjour” by Michael Franti and Spearhead will have you tapping your fingers or toes and bouncing. 

3.     “Blackbird” by Lennon and McCartney.  Although a Beatles fan, I am partial to Sarah McLachlan’s cover.  I am also partial to the particular way my son plays it on the guitar. Pretty and happy.

4.     “Life is Sweet” by Natalie Merchant.  “Don’t cry…I tell you life is sweet in spite of the misery there’s so much more.  Be grateful.” 

5.     “Set it Free” by Sarah Slean – she will have you skipping along and re-examining your perspective on life!

6.     “A Beautiful Thing” by The Tragically Hip.  Why?  Re-read the title, of course.

7.     “Oreo Cookie Blues” by Lonnie Mack and Stevie Ray but as covered by Suzie Vinnick.  You will never look at Oreos in the same way again. My goodness, what an incredible talent Ms. Vinnick is.

8.      “Viva la Vida” by Coldplay will have you dancing where you are.

9.     “Tom Sawyer” by Rush always makes me smile, and sing out loud if you must know.

10. “Beautiful Day” by U2. Well, of course.

11. “Roll the Windows Down" by Wyatt, who know how to make a happy toe-tapping, sing-along song!

12. "Sing Sing" or "What I Wouldn't Do" or anything else by Serena Ryder whose music always makes my day feel more beautiful.

These came to my head in no particular order, and there are plenty of other songs which I could've included but didn't, lest this blog became un-readable.  And before you all start sending me messages about how I am wrong or have failed to include certain songs, why don't you just add to the list instead?  There are many perspectives on what constitues a beautiful day.  That's how beauty works, right?

wishing you a beautifully musical day,

hk